Ego, White Noise, and Letting Your Heart-Voice Be Heard

(Mike DePung — Post II.109–17)

I really don’t like loud noises, high decibel sounds in general, especially unexpected. I have sensitive ears, I suppose. Ironically, though, I act inconsistently with that. I don’t like loud noises, but I seem to like noise.

Maybe you understand, or maybe you are much more focused and disciplined than me. The kind of noise I indulge in — oh, I don’t do it with malice aforethought — is the lower level decibels of all the input in the atmosphere. I allow Ego to turn it into distraction, to engage me in the busy-ness of life chattering all around me. That happens by default when I’m not engaging Heart as my primary operating system, my main life processor and filter. Honestly, I’m not worrying much about it, but it is symptomatic of many of us. Witness: fidget spinners!!!

Some of my distractibility is undoubtedly part of my very real ADD, which I don’t count as a disability for myself. It’s part of the reason I have so many interests and enjoy researching, reading, and writing about so many things. I can hear a few words of a speaker and be hooked, a few bars of music and be listening and singing for a half hour, or a few flashes of color from anywhere and my imagination takes off. I shouldn’t forget about smells and textures. The color-texture combination of Vincent van Gogh’s work makes him my favorite artist. How did I get to this point? OMG! It’s happening.

Okay, focus, Mike. Why do people, why do I, allow the distractions of life to be amplified by Ego into our minds and souls? Why is social media, which I value, so damn time-consuming for me at times and for many people much of the time?

When Ego succeeds, when we don’t consciously engage Heart, we are not facing life on our terms according to personal truth that requires thought, emotional energy, and action plans. Heart is always there, and we need to consciously connect, speak to Heart in order to stay focused, at least to do what is significant and satisfying to core Self. When we don’t do that, we end up feeling negative shit like regret and guilt. We won’t be living our Purpose.

How does that happen? Oh, thats easy! Ego, good old conformist-shaping Ego, through an infinite variety of ways, deep down, influences our thoughts and emotions. Ego takes those posts on social media, news, television, radio, movies, and who knows what else and convinces us that what we do either won’t make a real difference or it’s all been done before or is beyond our abilities. So, shrink, conform, acquiesce to reason, practicality. Drown out that failure with the noise. Just keep allowing the noise. White noise, noise that disengages the soul and mind, which disconnects us from Heart. Remember, Ego doesn’t want risk-takers who would attract and connect with others. It wants to isolate in order to protect, even if it means we are surrounded with and packed in with multitudes of other isolated souls.

This white noise that Ego produces from life in any venue, genre, avenue has the horrible effect as interpreted to our mind and soul of silencing our Voice, of squelching the good noise we could produce of who we are, that new-named core Self, that Heart-Self. That Ego-processed noise we consume keeps us from generating Heart-produced Voice of love and light.

Ultimately, all that goes on around us is not worthless or white noise; it only becomes so on an individual basis when we don’t toggle to the Heart operating system, which means we allow Ego to do its conforming, isolating work. I want to hear You, the core Self, real, true You. I want to hear the Heart-voice of all those around me, to fully sense the unique tones, hues, textures, aromas, and savors of You.

So, when I have to force myself to close out of social media, to turn off the ball game, or any other thing Ego is using to keep me quiet via sense numbing white noise, just know I’m turning to Heart in order to produce this work for others, maybe for you, because I know this is me and this is what I have to offer in love and light.